I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize