i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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