so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize