I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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