It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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