Sry I called you an 8
i just had sex bonerless
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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