So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize
