He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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