Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
