I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
