I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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