There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
how does that bad decision feel?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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