So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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