508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
whose ass print is on the piano?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
