once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
