It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
