I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize