Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
