he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
