i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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