Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
