YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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