new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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