# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
