That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Randomize
