this boner is exhausting
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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