i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
