That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I feel like death gave me a hand job
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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