well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
