That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i think i have herpe
just one?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
