he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Randomize
