about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
