Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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