grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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