You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
literally had 100 drinks last night.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
