who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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