what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize