And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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