He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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