I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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