Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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