We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
