I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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