wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize