last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
and you fell through a lawn chair
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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