How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
