Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Everything about him screamed your future.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Text me some of your sweat
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