READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I hope mine doesn't look like that
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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