I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize
