How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Randomize