Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize